woman sitting nervoiusly on the coach
Brandon Grooms

Opublikowano:  17 czerwca 2015
Zaktualizowano: 10 kwietnia 2021
Ilość komentarzy: 1

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That voice in your head isn’t always telling the truth

I’m over 70k in debt and I am making $14.04 an hour in a job that is completely unrelated to my degree … Would you call me a failure?

CZY chciałbyś dowiedzieć się co mówi wewnętrzny głos innych ludzi? Teraz masz okazje przeczytać wpis na blogu Bandona Grooms, w którym opisuje jakie myśli i słowa wkłada do jego głowy jego wewnętrzny krytyk. Przy okazji poćwiczysz też umiejętność czytania ze zrozumieniem, gdyż ten wpis jest w całości po angielsku.

That Voice In Your Head…

I graduated in 2005 with a Master’s Degree in Education. 10 years later, I’m over 70k in debt and I am making $14.04 an hour in a job that is completely unrelated to my degree. Let’s just say this wasn’t a part of my ’10 Year Plan.’ Would you call me a failure?

Here’s the rub: it doesn’t matter if you would call me a failure or not. In my mind, I have failed, but I’m not a failure. That would mean that I have quit or given up or that I am no longer trying to improve myself or make my life better. I don’t know how to quit doing that, so I won’t ever be a failure.

That’s not really what my point is though. Let’s compare myself to my younger brother. He just got back from Germany on a paid internship of sorts at a sister hospital with the one he works at now. Yep, younger bro is a doctor.

He graduated from med school when I was 30. At his graduation, my parents made it a point to tell me that they were just as proud of me as they were of him. It was a sweet gesture and it highlights how great my parents are. I told them “I’m 30, I’m proud of him too.” There wasn’t any jealousy between my brother and I and we pull for each other all the time. I couldn’t be more proud of him!

There was only one person who ever called me a failure; me.

I started my own business last year and failed. I made a little over $500 in sales and spent over $4k on credit cards and out of my 401k to fund it. I ended up with an extra 20k in credit card debt to live on while my business floundered.

Despite that, my parents never said I was a failure. My close friends never called me a failure. My wife and I argued about money but she never said I was a failure. My kids definitely didn’t think I was a failure. There was only one person who ever called me a failure; me.

I say this because I think we are often our own harshest critics. I think we think of others as somehow more competent than they actually are while simultaneously thinking of ourselves as more incompetent than we actually are. At almost every job that I have had, I remember thinking that I could never learn as much as one of the other co-workers only to find out that I got close to their level in a very short time and eventually passed them. More experience doesn’t necessarily mean better. More experience usually means more repetition, more redundancy.

The voice in your head isn’t always telling the truth! Go out and find what excites you. Try not to give everyone else so much credit and save some for yourself. You are better than you think you are!

Jeśli chciałbyś przeczytać więcej na temat pokonywaniu leków, przejdź na blog Conquering My Fears.

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  1. Totally Agree! Practicing a little Self Compassion can go a long way! I now try to think about what I would say if it was my best friend going through said issue and what I would say to them……it would be encouraging and positive. Constant battle to remind ourselves to treat ourselves as we would treat others.

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